I have been thinking about dad all day. After the funeral on November 2nd, I kept waiting for the realization of loss of my fathers earthly existence to hit me like a ton of bricks. The feeling never came, yet I still thought it might happen so I waited.
Then on the day that John was scheduled for surgery, in Bangkok, while I was still in the US helping mom, something changed. First, let me say that I have never been away from any of my children when they have had to have a major operation or even any kind of medical emergency. My heart was being pulled apart by miles, 7438.57 miles to be exact! I could almost feel it being torn apart, it was painful and I could find no comfort. As I knelt to pray for the second time that night - I plead with my Father in Heaven, with all the tender mercies of a parent, that John would be alright and know that I loved him. With tears pouring from my eyes and with a shaky voice I humbly asked, " Heavenly Father, if I can not be with my son, John at this critical time -could you please send my dad to be his guardian angel while he is in surgery." As soon as I said those words the most calming peaceful feeling came over me. It was as if I was encircled in the arms of not only my Heavenly Father but my earthy father as well.
President Joseph F. Smith once said,
"I believe we move and have our being in the presence of heavenly messengers and of heavenly beings. We are not separate from them. … We are closely related to our kindred, to our ancestors … who have preceded us into the spirit world. We can not forget them; we do not cease to love them; we always hold them in our hearts, in memory, and thus we are associated and united to them by ties that we can not break. … If this is the case with us in our finite condition, surrounded by our mortal weaknesses, … how much more certain it is … to believe that those who have been faithful, who have gone beyond … can see us better than we can see them; that they know us better than we know them. … We live in their presence, they see us, they are solicitous for our welfare, they love us now more than ever. For now they see the dangers that beset us; … their love for us and their desire for our well being must be greater than that which we feel for ourselves."
My dad lives and is watching me and is "soliciting for my welfare". He is my Guardian Angel.
My dad lives and is watching me and is "soliciting for my welfare". He is my Guardian Angel.
4 comments:
Amen...did you read my "share" today about how actual cells are shared between people? Joseph F. Smith was on to something...everything was created spiritually before...even cells...food for thought. You are an inspiration to me all the time!
I cried reading this post. You are an inspiration to me. May God keep you in the hollow of His hand.
This is so true! Isn't it such a blessing to have the gospel and to know so clearly the realities of eternity! I love your insight!
Wow Heidi, i got a bit teary reading your post. I am sorry for your loss. I know what it feels like to lose someone you love so dearly, yet i know they are so close to us!. Your experience made my heart beat faster, and i felt the spirit so strong!. I remember a friend saying she had a dream with someone who recently had passed away. She said that she ask them what was it like to die, and they were suddenly in the corner by a set of traffic lights and that person crossed the street and asked: Am i far from you?, and my friend said "No". Then they said, see?, i just crossed to the other side and even though i'm on on your side of the sidewalk you know i am very close... you might not see me or hear me soon but i will be watching over you. - I know, i truly know your Dad is there for you as he was for John during his surgery. Oh my dear Heidi.. how i miss you!. You have been an angel to me, and i will never forget our friendship and everything you and your family have done for me. Thank you for opening your heart to me. I love you
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